Living with a partner with ADHD often means taking on more than you signed up for. The same concerns get raised and don't resolve. You find yourself compensating in ways you didn't anticipate: absorbing the consequences of a decision made without you, managing money that isn't spent the way you'd have agreed to, quietly reorganizing your life around what isn't getting done. At some point the balance of the relationship starts to feel less like a partnership and more like a responsibility.
What makes this so difficult to navigate is that you can't always tell how much is ADHD and how much is something else — about your partner, about the relationship, or about what you're willing to accept. You may have read about ADHD and tried to understand that time blindness isn't indifference, forgotten commitments aren't carelessness, and impulsive choices aren't always about you. Knowing that doesn't always make it easier to live with.
In individual therapy, you have a space to sort out what's ADHD, what's the relationship, and what's about you. From there, it's easier to see where you've been compensating past the point that's sustainable. Some of that shows up in how you communicate with your partner; some of it is having a place to think without managing anyone else's reaction. What you land on helps whether or not your partner changes.
If this is the dynamic you're in, I'm glad to discuss it.